Top ten ways to abuse mattress there were many times i visit relatives, distant course, and witnessed terrible acts of abuse on the mattress. i saw the video on the internet, on television shows Hadley Creek Outfitters home videos, or even in the news after a person is hurt because they leapt from the roof while their friends their flight captured on video. these are times when i guess it’s a good thing that we’ve gone soft and comfortable feather and down on the hard metal springs rusting in our spines.
I’d hate to see high-quality bedding endure such abuses. this is a top ten list i put together to pay homage to their brilliance, are willing to sacrifice themselves for the sake of a little fun. sadly though, it was the mattress really Hadley Creek Outfitters suffer. starting ten. (10) as a trampoline. ok, so we’ve all done it as children in one way or another. the real question is have you ever seen a group of children jumping on the mattress as a trampoline in their backyard? (9) as a sun shade. ever smelled cooked sweat and dirt? yes, even the prettiest of us can dirty up a mattress.
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I do not think i need to list the many functions of the human body. (8) a sled in the winter, (or during a rainy season for the matter- of mattress used as a sled at any time is just wrong, or desperate). seriously, $ 5 bucks at the dollar store will get a plastic sled … or just try a trashcan lid, it is free and right outside. (7) baseball wall. throwing a baseball on a mattress set up as a target wall, however useful, is just plain abusive.
A constant repetition of getting pegged with a hard ball is kind of like getting flicked the nose repeatedly. not very pleasant, is it? (6) as a backer for a gun / crossbow target. the gun and bow make short work of the mattress, spilling its innards everywhere jethro lawn. make sure that no one person behind it though; bullets and carbon arrows tend to go straight through even the highest quality mattress. at least the poor bastard put against a wall and execute him properly. (5) used a knife to sea.
Find something better to throw your knives, really. you have a serious problem invasion, or you’re upset about your lack of quality in the sack. try a foam mattress topper or something similar for your murderous intent, they are worth less than the mattress anyway. (4) as a basis for a camp fire. more like a bonfire, and yes i have witnessed this act of genius. (3) as a sumo suit. feel like getting some aggression out on your loved one? pay the extra cash and the dawn of a real one. it’s a lot more fun, and more protective. the pictures are better too; imagine future generations looking back at photos of you wrapped in an old, dirty mattress.
(2) as a wrestling mat. not that it will not work, but really? the mattress makes for a small mat even if you use a king size. you can double up and put the two side by side, but then when suplex your arch-enemy onto the makeshift stage, mattresses tend to slip apart and your buddy land on hard ground. .. is the complete opposite of what you’re going for, unless you are trying out for an early retirement from extreme wrestling. trust me, their career was painfully short. (1) as a mat to catch you when you jump off the roof of your house for a youtube video.
I do not think it warrants any further explanation. just do a search and have fun. so there you have it, my top ten list of mattress abuse. i saw it, at least you have seen some of them, and all we can do is laugh at genius tasks backyard. sean w. tucker is the author of this article and can provide additional information about high fill power down bedding and the proper use of such things. “there are better uses for bedding if you know what i mean.” click the link downcrowd and know – downcrowd.